All I want for Xmas ….

---- is You J You, the Diplomat You. 

Hehee corny I know.

I’m nervous actually, it’s only 2 days before our big meet up. I will be flying off to his place on 24^th. 

At first I was planning to go alone, but at the last minute after reading The Rules (my dating bible) I decided to not be “too available” and bring my bestie L with me instead. As I told Mr Diplomat, it’s to “protect me from the big bad wolves” J Oh how damsel in distress I sound like, exactly how men loves it. Did I tell u I’m a Scorpio and we are famed for our scheming ways?

He invited me to be his date for a wedding there. As usual my life isn’t complete without its share of mini-soap opera-ish dramas- the groom at the wedding is actually my ex’s best friend! The ex whom I tried to con out of our reunion earlier in this blog
(refer to my blog titled "I think I am innocent and sweet. They think I’m a Player. Dammit"). This is what I get for dating another fish from the same pond – so I can’t complaint really. Hahaa

This afternoon Mr Diplomat told me the Groom dropped by at his office to pick up some documents and send his regards to me. The Groom even asked him again to re-confirm that he was going with me, the Blair Waldorf.

LoL. 

There goes my plan to discreetly date this guy! I just know that the Groom will tell his best friend (my ex), and a few other guys …. And tongues will wag again. Sigh… that’s the price you pay for fame. It’s not easy being me, I tell u! ;)

Anyhoo…. Wish me luck. I am too lazy to get into this courting game again and all I want for Xmas and forever after is Mr Diplomat. This means I can put an end to this dating game and start making babies! Lol. 

Seriously though, I really believe in my hearts of hearts that he’s the one for me. I like every single thing about him. Now the ball is in his court – I have been praying and hoping and wishing that he would feel the same way too. That he truly is The One. 

Please God, grant me by Xmas Wish! J

Until then, I shall focus on enjoying myself and not fret otherwise I will start panicking and that won’t do me any good.

xoxo

My (maybe) bday gift from up above

Last week was my birthday.

It was a day of revelations – a lot of guys I didn’t even know existed on my FB List greeted me hbd wishes J As I was checking them out, somehow I came across a very yummilicious guy : my latest crush and hopefully The One. 

He is a Diplomat aka Mr Diplomat; and he was my primary school class mate. Yes, I know I dated 4 of my primary school mates before to disastrous ending, but heck maybe I just haven’t dated the right primary school guy, right? I’m an optimist that way J

OMG I do think I am falling crazily in love …. He is so my type: tall, fair, gorgeous smile, comes from a good family, smart, funny and humble. 

So where was he all these while? Somewhere below the radar. I guess we were always unavailable to each other before this, I was with someone else and he was involved in a serious relationship too. In fact I thought he was already married or at least engaged. That’s why when I saw his FB status was “single” I didn’t waste any time to get down and dirty: I messaged him pronto.

To my pleasant surprise he immediately replied, and added me on his BBM J After that we flirted the entire day on bbm… and continued again the next day and the next. In fact he even mentioned a few things that made me realise he has been keeping tab on the going-ons in my life! I even pointed that out to him “Mr Diplomat, you have been spying on me!” lol. He just gave me a virtual wink and said “it’s all open source, baby”. J

In fact some of the things he mentioned are things that have happened or I told him a few years ago, things I didn’t even know he knew or remembered! Isn’t that interesting?

Whatever it is I guess that it means he is interested. How interested? Je nais sais pas. I have no idea. (Cue: only time will tell)

I will be going to stay at his place abroad where he is posted, for Xmas break and I guess we’ll see how that goes. Oh yeah, I skilfully masterminded a Xmas break to his place the moment I found out he’s a Diplomat there. Of course he thought I am going there as part of a long planned reunion with my friends; when in fact it was a spur of the moment decision made out of purely romantic intentions.

Seize the moment.

A girl gotta do what a girl gotta do right? I can’t just let a golden opportunity like this slips away; it’s not always that he’s single at the same time that I am; plus he is so on the market for a wife! 

He told me so himself that “It’s hard being an expat in a foreign country, especially when you’re single and alone”; “I am looking for someone to take-over the finance and home affairs portfolio of my personal universe”. LOL. Is that a big hint or what?

I have been on cloud 9 ever since. He is hotness. He is so my type: tall, fair, gorgeous smile, funny, charming, comes from privileged background, humble and very smart (oops I told you that already!). We clicked so well, I just enjoyed our conversations and he really knows how to make me laugh.

If he’s really the one it would be so cool…. Imagine the annoying cute guy (yup even back in primary school he was already cute) who always pulled pranks on me, to grow up into a handsome diplomat who courts me off my feet (amen).  Classic fairy tale I tell you.

Perhaps he is my b’day wish comes true?

Well…. Until then, wish me luck. I will keep you updated on our Xmas Day Romance.

xoxo

HJNTIY Theory

I am on an analytical mode after the last post.

Based on the “im not into you” theory, I deduced that Mr Movie Producer is definitely not interested.  

As for Mr Rock Star, I casually mentioned that I think he sees me as a rebound buddy. 

Yes I really told him that on BBM. 

The result? He immediately rang, adamantly protesting that I am not his rebound buddy and promptly asked me for a movie date.

We watched Eat.Pray.Love at 1130pm on a weekday (the same night).

He was dozing for at least half of the movie, and yet when he woke up he just wanted to know if I enjoyed it. I did. He was glad. I was on cloud9 – that is for approximately 12 hours.

 On the 12 hour and 1sec after that he went back into “now you see me, now you don’t” mode. His reason is that he is back in the Studio to cut a new album so he is v occupied now. OK. We shall see if that’s a reason, or excuse. If he’s into me or not. What do u think?

Mr Hotness meanwhile was silent for 2 days after I returned. Not a good sign. He should have been the first to text me when I arrive (just like what my ex did above).  Just as I was about to write him off as a spring fling, he texted me… “hope everything is fine there. Missing you here…J” He then went on to mention a few things abt having to concentrate on his final exams in 3 weeks time and being extremely occupied in the meantime. Ooookay. That’s another reason or excuse?

You may think I am being too analytical or cynical. I am not. I am just being alert to the signs. I am not clueless anymore, and I need to know when to stop daydreaming and move on. Don’t you agree?

Ps: in the end what the book says is plain and simple: guys mean what they say. If they say they’re busy it means they are. If they say they want to go out with you, it means they do. If they don’t say anything about going out with you then they don’t want to go out with you. Simple. If they love you they will tell you and you will know. So far nobody has said anything to that effect so I shall just wait. I will just add Mr Rock Star and Mr Hotness into my KIV list J

Xoxo

The book that changed my (love) life

I was reading Glamour magazine today (UK edition, Oct 2010) and one article stood out from the rest : it’s about the 12 dating mistakes the writer wished she knew when she was 21! The writer is now 31 and the stuffs she listed made me smile and go “holy-molly, this girl sounds like me!”

That made me realise that probably there are millions of “Me” around in the world, clueless and making the same mistakes over and over. I hope they read that article in Glamour and start CHANGING for God’s Sake! J

I won’t list the whole 12 things – go read the mag if u wanna know the full story.  I shall only share the top learning that I WISH I had known 10 years ago:

If a guy likes u, he will tell you he likes you. He will be so into you that you will just know.

Yup, this is SO true. “He’s Not That Into You” – that magical book by Greg Bernhardt is the first time this fact got hammered into my head real hard.  That book changed my life. Overnight. If you haven’t read it yet, then stop reading this blog NOW and go get it. RIGHT NOW! Yes, NOW! Thank you.

Do you want to know how I discovered the book?

Nope, nobody recommended it to me. It just happened to be one of those miraculous moments that you thought would only happen in movies:

It was the evening after the lunatic deranged call I made to my ex-primary-school-scandal at 5 a.m (Read my blog entry on August 29^th,2010) after I found out he got engaged. I was @Kinokuniya, KLCC waiting for my bff for a cuppa coffee and goss session after work (I took EL that day as I was so broken-hearted by the engagement news). As I passed one of the shelves a book fell out and I stooped to pick it up. Yup, you’re right: it’s that book HJNTIY! What are the odds that it fell into my lap, literally?!

I read the title, the back cover and decided to get it to heal my broken heart. 2 years later I still have a broken heart but I guess without that book it could have been worse!

That book taught me that if a guy likes you he will pull all the stops to make you his.

Hmm….. if that’s the case then I must say there was ever only one guy who did that to me.

Oops that’s a lie. The truth is there were a few who was blatantly courting me,. However there was ever only one guy I LOVED who did that to me: my first ex.

He was so into me that even after we broke up he couldn’t let it go. He probably (and we strongly suspected that) even practiced black magic on me to make me go back to him (true story, but let’s save that for another day).  

You know, until today despite everything, I know that he was into me, at least during our honeymoon period:

1.     1. He called to ask me out for coffee even though that time he was in UK and I was in KL (lol!) . Seriously some guys I know in KL can’t even ask me out for a cup of coffee because “too busy with work honey” etc (like Mr Movie Producer guy).

2.       He was the last person to text me goodbye when I boarded the flight out of the country, and his was the first text I got when I switched on my hp once I landed.  Every single time (we were in an LDR – long distance romance).  Erm…. Mr Rock Star guy didn’t even realise I was back from my trip to Aus until I texted him and told him so.  Boo-hoo.

3.       He was complaining about us not spending enough time together and was always bugging me to make space in my calendar for him. ….. LOL. Actually that time when it happened I just moved to UK and was piling on weight (err 10kg extra to be exact!!) so I was desperately avoiding him in an attempt to crash diet! There was no way I was gonna let him see me fat! In the end we only met each other after 2 months of my diet and I lost 5 kg J  ………  You know what, I try hard not to compare anyone with my ex but seriously, with his successors I realise that I am the one who is always looking for a space in their calendar – to steal a bit of “us” time. They are always too busy for me. Hmm…… but Mr Hotness did make some time for me when I was in Aus, more so than I thought. Maybe there’s hope there J

4.       He just wanted me to himself: he always prefer to not “share” me when we go out, ie our “date days” are just the 2 of us, not a double date or going out in a group date. Any outings with our friends will be preceded or prelude with a private moment of just the 2 of us.

Hmm… sounds like the perfect guy huh? So the big question is, why did we break up? Why did I dump him? It’s a long story... let’s just say sometimes love alone isn’t enough, it doesn’t make the world goes round (cliché but true).

xoxo

Friday Blues

I went out with him last night…. And he brought a girl friend. Not GF, just a platonic friend.

That’s alright, but he also mentioned casually during one of our tet-a-tet that he has a GF. This is his exact line “when my girlfriend and I fought, I did this….” IDK whether that’s a generalized statement as in “when couples fight”… or if he was being specific. If he was being specific shouldn’t the sentence go this way “when my ex and I fought, I did this…”?

Anyways whatever it is, as I mentioned previously that sentence and the fact that I was relegated to the backseat in the car (because his girl pal sat in front) didn’t sit very well with my heart. My poor achey breaky heart (is that the right expression?)

Jut to put things into context, his friend (whom he has known since 5 years ago) just arrived in Australia that morning, and spending 4 days to visit him. She finally made the trip there after promising him for so long. In her own words “I have to make it this year because he’s leaving Australia for good in Dec!”

They were frolicking in the sand, hugging and chasing each other. Maybe I exaggerate but that’s how it seems from my point of view :P

Nontheless I am thankful and a bit flattered that he was true on his promise to see me on Thursday and take me around town. His bff (who also joined us) said that I am very lucky to have him with me because he is a very busy guy. Even the guys had to book his diary in advance to make appointments. Awww… sweet.

Still, that doesn’t help to lessen this envious pain in my heart.

Dunno why I feel this great big pang of jealousy when he is just a crush I’ve known for less than a week?! Maybe its PMS (yup today’s my first day) … or maybe I am just tired of living in denial or selective amnesia or pretend oblivion – choose one or all of the above.

He is not the first guy who is “emotionally unavailable” to me – mr A with his trespasser GF, Mr B the Rockstar with his attachment to his past, Mr C who just can’t get out of work mode and now Mr Hotness…. with a probable GF in tow.

I can’t continue doing this to myself, this is self sabotage! 

I must start looking for a man who is single. Absolutely, 100% single with no small prints, disclaimers or emotional attachments to someone other than me. Where is that person? Where can I find him?

Honestly, I haven’t been looking for these emotionally unavailable men, but they managed to find me. Did I have antennae that attract them? How can I realign my signal so that I capture only the right ones?

I am so down. Though I pretend to be happy and have fun and a laugh about it, deep down I feel disappointed every time I saw or find out or hear about the other person. 

The girl for whom their smile, their gaze, their tender caring touch and their heart, soul and future is pledged to. I want to be that girl. Not the other person, outside looking in, forever wishing that it’s me.

Mr B the Rockstar hasn’t contacted me at all while I was in Oz. I am not sure now whether he is into me. Even if he is, I don’t know whether he is free with absolutely no strings attached.

Back to square one huh, B.

Cue ColdPlay The Scientist: “Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it’s gonna be this hard, I’m going back to the start”.

Xoxo

The perfect guy

Have you ever met a man so perfect that you think to yourself “whoever who ends up with him is one helluva lucky girl”?

I have met him. In fact I met him 4 days ago on Saturday, and again last night.

He has the most beautiful soulful eyes I have ever seen, a pair of perfect dimples, full lips that just beg to be kissed, and a smile that literally makes me hot and sweaty.  It’s true! When he walked into my suite the other night, I felt so hot that I wanted to switch off the heater – that’s when I realised that it wasn’t even switched on! Lol.

Oh, did I mention his sizzling body? 

Ohmygod….. my skin tingles just thinking about it! He has gorgeous lean muscular arms and a 6 pack abs (I am assuming this based on how well his shirt fits his body), and I know, beyond any reasonable doubts that I would love waking up next to this hot bod every day for the rest of my life.  He is so Yummilicious!!!! I am officially in Lust! J

How I wish I can just upload his pix here bec words simply can’t do him justice. Let me attempt to illustrate to you though…. Let’s just say in my eyes he is a cross between Robert Downey Junior and Enrique Iglesias. Yes, truly he is THE hot-ness!

So how did I meet him? 

We were introduced online by a mutual friend. We weren’t really chummy with each other until about a month ago. About the same time of the high school reunion almost-fiasco, he started making regular appearances on my fb comments wall.

L noticed it too, in fact she was the one who first noticed it. As fate has it, I was posted to Australia for a fortnight on work assignment last week. Guess where Mr Hotness is? You got it – right smack in the same city where I was posted! Talk about kismet, eh?

So we finally meet J 

As much as I am tempted to gush about him again, I won’t bore you with the details (although he is really very yummilicious!)... 

ah well, u know wut, who cares about you. This is MY blog so I will indulge all I want (prepare to be bored! Hahaha):

I just couldn’t take my eyes off him. He is so cute! And handsome, adorable, sexy, cool all rolled into one. I thought I was the only one who was giggly but based on my observation, he was extremely … err… happy too. He was just so gay (gay = happy! Not gay-plu) throughout the night.  He was a lot more calm on the second night we met – and I believe, so was I. definitely less giggles on my end.

Oops… rewind. 

Ok so we met, and went for dinner with his friends in tow. At first I planned to keep my age a secret but when his friends asked (after I carelessly told them my work history) I realised I can’t possibly be 21 with all these job experiences I have had and shared with them! So I told them the truth – that I am OLD… 6 years older. Oh how I wish I am much younger then, or that he’s my age.

He was really sweet about it : 

1. He didn’t appear shocked at all (ok, is that a good sign or bad sign? :P) 2. He said “6 years is nothing… plus you don’t look it at all” … yeay! J

Then he turned and stared deep into my eyes and said something. Then he repeated it again and I realised that he was asking me something but I couldn’t hear him because I was hearing cupid’s harp playing in my ears (yes, I can be very dreamy that way). It was embarrassing actually bec I had to ask him to repeat his sentences quite a few times that night… it’s just so hard not to be “lost” in dreamland when I look into those beautiful eyes!

Honestly speaking, I couldn’t really describe in detail what happened that night because my memory is fuzzy with visions of his hotness. I took some pictures and we looked so good together. In fact I showed the pix to my besties and they all commented that I looked younger than him (awww thanks girls, I love y’all).

I am still in a semi-dreamland I guess. He took me out again last night to complete the city tour that he promised me, and to my disappointment he brought his 2 bffs along. Ah well…. That’s ok, as long as I get to feast on him (with my eyes). He was borrowing his friend’s car so it’s only fair to ask them to join along for the ride. Btw I suspected that his friend, the car owner has a mega crush on me. Oookay. Move aside dude, I wanna stare at ur best friend. Hehe

Last night was beautiful …. We went to the city’s lookout and took pictures. He was wearing this insanely sexy skinny rock star jeans with a tee that subtly enhances his hot muscles. (drools).

Then we had a lovely cup of hot choc at an Italian restaurant. There he did one of those stare deep into my eyes moment again and I felt so weak at the knees (thankfully I was sitting down at the time!). I sat next to him as he drive and it felt so good… to be able to pretend just for a little while that he belongs to me. That we are a couple of lovebirds.  How I wish its reality and that I don’t have to pretend at all!

Just as the night was about to end, he detoured and insisted on a late supper. I was more than happy to oblige because I don’t ever wish for the night to end either (either?! Haha wishful thinking). During that time at the supper place, I casually mentioned that I am planning for a USA road trip next year. After a while he shyly said he would love to join, if it’s ok with me, please keep him posted. Of course! It’s a long time away, but heck, any reasons to keep in touch (literally!!! Ahahaha) are welcome! J

On top of that he also asked me out again on Thursday night, to go to a factory outlet store.  Of course I said yes although I wish he asked me for a date, just me and him. Alas he did not, so I guess maybe he isn’t that into me. Oh well, I didn’t keep my hopes up high because like I mentioned, I don’t really know him. All I know is that I am definitely in love with his physique. And I have made many mistakes because of that. I must learn my lesson and not repeat it again.

To be perfectly honest with you, I am not sure whether he is single. I remember clearly that in June he had a girlfriend. I remember that because he was back in KL around then and was asking me about a job for his girlfriend. I remember he changed his fb status to “in a relationship”. However when he contacted me again last month, and I went to his page to check out his relationship info, I saw that he has hidden that detail from me.

At the moment I am pretending that I have a selective amnesia – because to say that I don’t know abt his gf would be a lie – I actually commented on her pic that he had in his album, saying he is lucky to have her as his gf!  There is no way out of that one, is there? Lol.

Again, I will just pretend oblivion to whatever his relationship status is. Of course I am seriously hoping that he is single. His bff (who introduced us) has been trying to hook us up for a long time. In fact when the bff found out about my little trip Down Under, he wished me luck – that I will be able to go on a date with Mr Hotness. Amen to that darling J

I am not placing much hope in this match because I don’t really know this guy (as mentioned above)… but he has reminded me of my weakness for beautiful things. I wonder, should I lie to myself and pretend that looks don’t matter to me? Or should I just be true and admit that I am superficial – just that this time I must also look for a guy with a bit of substance as well? Should I force myself to fancy someone I don’t find any physical attraction to (but is perfect otherwise) or should I not be a hypocrite and still settle with someone pleasing to my eyes, BUT to be extra careful that he has a great partner traits as well?

I prefer the latter.

Did I tell you when we arrived at my hotel and I was happily bidding him goodbye and saying that I will see him again back home, he smiled widely and said “Thursday. I will see you again on Thursday”. J It’s flattering to know my Mr Hotness wants to meet me again. (and again, and again for infinity I hope J) …. 

Oops did I tell u he will bring along his visiting friends on Thu? That’s not special… and what if one of them is his gf? I so can’t bring myself to see him with someone else. Ahhh the heartache!

For now, I just want to live in the moment and enjoy every seconds of it. I don’t want to think of my fears … because they are false expectations appearing real.

This has been a memorable spring time indeed.

Xoxo

The clash of the titans

My party day was a success J

Firstly A came with GF, who turned out to be nothing to be envied of. She’s pretty but according to L (and I concur), she is also very stuffy. Didn’t speak a word to anyone and was so terribly clingy. She was practically throwing herself at her boyfriend throughout the evening. She makes me feel claustrophobic by looking at her. Meowww J

In fact Serena and I concluded that A’s bff doesn’t approve of the GF either, that’s why he has been asking me to join him, his Mrs, and A ; just the 4 of us – to London for their good friend’s wedding. Conveniently leaving or ignoring A’s gf in the equation. Lol.  A is a really eligible bachelor (if he is single that is) – he doesn’t smoke, is very nice, religious, smart, rich, a gentleman… and best of all we really click J perfect except that he’s taken.  Hmm….

Mr C didn’t come; he had to rain-check at the last minute because of a family commitment. I was a tad disappointed and a tad relieved at the same time. At least those 3 guys couldn’t gang up and goss about me J I am disappointed because I was really looking forward to meet him. Sigh… maybe he’s just not that into me huh? Poor me.

Mr B was here, looking every inch the rock star that he is in skinny black jeans – pulling it off pretty well too! Everyone can see he was doting over me, which is sweet. However it’s also possible that he was keeping close to me because I was the only one he knows at the party!

He was the last to leave and he called me when he reached home. Wanted to know how I got over my ex fiancée so soon – I guess it’s his subtle way to ask for tips on how to get over his ex gf (told u so the guy’s on a rebound! not that he mentioned it, but it is pretty obvious isn’t it?).

For the first time in a long time I recounted the traumatic chapter in my life. I surprised myself by choking up tears when I talked about it, especially when recounting some ugly incidents when he punched and bruised me. I guess some scars are taking longer to heal…. If ever.

One thing’s for sure, I know that I am over him. He was such a jerk and I know I deserve someone much better. It’s not that hard too to find someone better – as long as that person doesn’t hit me, he’s already someone way much better! J

I also discovered a few things that empowered me : that I have a very strong network of support system around me – my family, my bffs, and God.  They all helped me see the light and given me the courage to move on. I can even jog now at what used to be “our” path, because now I don’t care about him anymore. Whatever happens, I don’t give a damn about him, don’t care, and never will again. I can live without him and that realization is empowering J

Mr B said “I adore your patience and your strength in getting through it” Wow. Against my better instinct (hello, this guy is still in rebound phase!) I felt a tingle in my heart when he said that J

Confession: I must admit that I do miss my ex’s company though.  Especially when it comes to grocery shopping.

This morning when I went to do my grocery shopping for the Party, I loaded so many things in the shopping cart.

The store prohibits us from taking the cart to the parking lot, so normally, in my past life what I did was guard the cart in front of the store while my (ex) fiancée would take the car and drove it up to the store front where I would be waiting. Then we would load the bags into the trunk together.

This morning I totally forgot about not having a fiancée until I stepped out of the store with my loaded to the brink cart. That’s when I realised “Shit, I can’t take this back to the car and I can’t leave it here either. So much for independence!”

I had to double back to the store, look for a security guard and pleaded for him to help guard the cart while I go and fetch my car. That was embarrassing. Felt like a real loser. Especially when there were other women (and men) beside their carts, no doubt waiting for their partners to fetch them in some fancy car. And here I am, struggling on my own with a guard to keep my poor lonely cart company! And did I mention it was raining heavily too? Yuks.

 I so need a bf! Good Lord, please give me one now… I really need him especially when I grocery shop! Amen.

Despite that minor hiccup, I am happy to report that the party was fantastic, everyone (except the GF) got along well with each other, mr A and Mr B did not become bffs or swap goss abt me (phew), and everyone left with a full tummy and a happy heart J

Next up – I need to start planning a way to go out with Mr C without asking him out. Makes sense?

Ps: my bff L is super scared right now that she may be preggie! Oh noes. She so can’t get pregs yet bec we have a girlie trip planned for next June. Whatever happens she must plan around that plan. After a few SOS session in the kitchen at the Party, we finally found a cure – L recommended a pill that will help ensure she is clean (don’t ask me what it is or even if it is morally acceptable. It sounds a good plan at the time J) We’ll keep you updated!

Xoxo

B

Another collision course is about to happen!

When will I ever learn my lesson?  

Fresh from that Reunion Fiasco, I decided that I have been bitten by  the “Party Organiser Bug”. I am itching for another party. So I organised a Dinner Party at my place – this Tuesday. 

Everything was going smoothly until yesterday when some clouds started forming in an otherwise sunny plan:

You see I have a crush on 3 guys right now. 

Hmmm… ookay, maybe I am a player. Heck, im OLD (though I don’t look it hehe). Im not gonna place all my eggs in one basket. I need to date at least 3 guys at once J Let’s call them Mr A, Mr B and Mr C.

I initially invited my bffs + partners and Mr A to the party. Mr A has a girlfriend but I am pretending oblivion to that fact. He never mentioned it either (isn’t it interesting?!). Anyways in a twist of events that I should have known, the gf has self-invited herself to the party. Iyeww.  Trespasser alert!

Short of calling the police and causing a commotion, I decided that’s out of my control. I can’t suddenly say to Mr A “please don’t bring your gf bec she is unwanted. I only want you.”  That’s so … not the Rules Girl that I am. Still, just an interesting fact – he still hasn’t breathed a word abt her to me, or the fact that she is coming. (I found out through my spy that she is coming).

So because of that, I decided to come up with plan B. To distract myself from feeling envious and bitchy towards the GF, I will have another hot guy at the Party. So i invited Mr B. Mr B said yes. Hooray! J Mr B is a rock star (yes, really), he is cute and we click really well. However he is on a rebound (he just broke up less than a month ago!) so I am treading cautiously.

Ok … sounds good… until I had too much ice cream this morning and in a fit of sugar rush, contacted Mr C (whom I fancy the MOST right now) and asked him to my party. I didn’t expect him to say YES because he is so busy finishing his movie (he is a movie producer), but that’s what he said : YES!

In other circumstances I would’ve been ecstatic, jumped up and down screaming Yeayyy at the top of my lungs. Not this time, however. This time my reaction was “Oh noes! I did it again!! Doink!” I am so NOT gonna have all 3 guys I am flirting with to be in the same room at the same time!

V asked me “what’s wrong with that?”

These are how it can go wrong:

1.       They clicked so well and turned into besties and started swapping stories abt me; after which they decide that I am a female Casanova and they run away and never look back. And there ends my love life.

2.       They started flirting with me and I ignored all of them OR I flirted with all. Both not good option

3.       They fought with each other for my attention – very flattering. Maybe I can pretend that they’re all normal friends and that I don’t have feelings for anyone and let them outdo each other to court me.  Maybe this is the way to quicken the pace for Mr C to finally propose!

Of course in the ideal world no.3 would happen. My world is anything BUT ideal. 

Oh shoot. What am I supposed to do? What a dilemma. What was I thinking of, flirting with all 3, and inviting all of them to be in the same room.

Right now all I can do is pray that

1.       A’s gf will not turn up (that would be one less headache)

2.       Both A and gf won’t turn up (that saves me from the sin of coveting someone else’s bf. hehe)

3.       B will turn up

4.       C only turns up for 30min and quickly go back to work on his movie.

If only I can control circumstances then that’s what I’d do. For now all I can do is pray for the best.

The story of my life huh….

Ps: Mr C is the one whom I want to marry right now. I don’t love him. I fancy him as my husband though because he is a millionaire (after his dad passed away), extremely good looking with a body to die for, smart and pretty spiritual too. The best package.  But (there’s always a but isn’t it?!) he is also still holding a grudge at me for choosing a jerk over him (whom he hates).He also always got on my nerve. Every time we go out we would end up fighting or having one of those “agree to disagree” moments.

Without these two stumbling blocks I am sure we would have been happily married with a dozen kids by now. Sigh.

Have I told u, this is the story of my life? Oh I did up there. Nevertheless I hope good things will happen soon. Wish me luck for Tuesday. (OMG that’s tomorrow already! V. Gulp).

Adieu.

xoxo

I think I am innocent and sweet. They think I’m a Player. Dammit.

I went to my school reunion the other day.
Someone entrusted me with the responsibility and burden of organising it since he wants to leverage on my power of popularity and influence.

Urm popular? Really?

Anyways I got sucked into it. I guess its kinda hard to resist the flattery of being called “popular and influential”…  to refuse means admitting that I wasn’t popular or influential. That I was a nobody. Now,  as humble as I am, I wouldn’t stoop that low! :P

I report with pleasure that I was able to pull in some more popular girls from by batch.
Maybe I was popular after all.... I dunno.  What I do know is that I suddenly had some issues when I started on my list of guys to invite to the reunion! Shite.

I dated at least 4 of the guys in my batch. They were all popular guys with their own “posse”.

Not inviting them would mean not inviting their posse as well… and that’s like a quarter of the school’s guys population! Sigh.

The first guy on my “primary school black book” was Mr R. Our relationship was quite serious (we have both met each other’s parents) until I dumped him.

The second guy, Mr K, proposed to me 3 times (including once in public at a dinner party in front of all our mutual friends) and I rejected each and every one. Now he wouldn’t talk to me.  Not even FB chat! Geez. What did I do? Seriously… it’s not like I married and divorced him 3x right? Meow…!

Third guy is a guy I was crazily infatuated with – I was practically stalking him every day. It ended when he announced he was engaged and I called him at 5am just to shout at him for being engaged. Err…  I did say CRAZILY infatuated right? Yeah.. he was one of those guys who can do that to women….. and yep, that phone call definitely goes into my Hall of Shame. Boo-hoo L

My final ‘scandal’ is with a guy whom I totally ignored when he was courting me. I was just into him for a week (when I even drove 4 hours to his work place outstation just to send him Lunch!) and quickly lost interest afterwards. He was smitten after the lunch trip while I realised right then that I wasn’t that into him. I’m easily bored that way.

I bet they hate me…

Damn it, what will happen if they’re all in the same room or place at the same time?! I bet they’re gonna have a nice goss session about me, swapping stories.

Oh noes, how can I let that happen? I shall not let that happen. I will not invite them to the Reunion. And who cares about their posse either. It’s my party, my rules !

Ok, that’s not nice. What I mean is, since I’m the organizer, I have the veto power to decide who I want to be invited. If anyone has a problem with that, then by all means please take this job over from me.  By all means….  (blablabla)

Alas. Easier said than done. With Facebook, everyone can just invite whomever they want. I can’t just simply announce “please don’t invite mr 1, mr 2, mr 3 and mr 4 because we had scandalous past… and they hate me”.  Tongues will wag! I do have a reputation (the most popular girl… ahem) to uphold here.

And thus that was exactly what happened – some people invited these guys! 

The thing is as the Host and Organiser I have to meet and greet everyone at the Reunion. i.e I need to be there and visible. I couldn’t just go MIA or hide behind a masquerade mask when these guys turn up!

Lol. What a crazy predicament.  Emergency mode ON.

Luckily for me, as I found out later on the FB Event’s Page, the guys have a bigger ego than me (thank God for that!). They refused to turn up at an event organised by moi, yours truly, that person they wanna avoid. They all clicked NO, I am Not Attending. Thank God!! The feeling’s mutual hun!

However there was one guy with lesser ego than the rest. He actually clicked “yes”. It’s Guy no.1 Mr R, whom I dumped. Yuks.

Urm. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a really nice guy for someone out there. Just not for me. The reason I dumped him was … well, isn’t it ironic: it was because he wasn’t man enough. He’s got no pride or ego. He’s a pushover. Big surprise that he’s turning up despite it being hosted by the one who broke his heart and jumped all over it. I’m not normally that bad, just that he asked for it. Really. If he stood up for himself, then I wouldn’t have been able to do that!

Let me tell u what happened to that poor guy on Reunion Day.
You see I banned him from my FB so he couldn’t see any private messages that I sent out to the Group. He can only see whatever public postings on the Group Event’s page. So when I sent out a private message to the group about the change of venue, he didn’t get it. (It was intentional on my part, like Duh). 

So there I was happily hosting the Reunion when suddenly just as everyone was about to start on dessert, he stood in front of me with the guy who originally pushed me to plan this reunion. That guy, Mr A said “hey B! U didn’t tell Mr R that we changed the venue? Poor Mr R was waiting for us at –the original venue- for over an hour. Luckily he had my number and called.”

Ooops sorry.....
Sorry that he found out the real venue that is.
Ugh… he couldn’t even confront me himself. What a Loser. (make L sign on my forehead).

(Disclaimer: What was I doing dating a loser in the first place? I went out with him because he didn’t seem like one then : he is extremely good looking – he looks like Christiano Ronaldo, a millionaire’s son,  drove a pretty decent car and I had a big crush on him when in school. After 6 months with him I realised that he’s actually just a pretty face with no substance, hence I dumped him. Anyone could have made that mistake right?)

The whole room fell silent as everyone paused to hear my explanation. I guess by then some words must have leaked out that we were dating.
I just said “owh, I guess it’s a technical error, you know how unreliable FB can be”.

Everyone smiled and nodded. Phew. That was a quick fix. It’s time to make my exit before things get worse.

The next day I received a msg from one of the boys. Apparently word had gotten around about Guy No.1 – Guy No.4. Yikes!

And apparently they think I’m some sort of hot stuff because of that.
I’m the legendary … err… female Casanova (or is it Matahari? Or Cleopatra? Or maybe Helen of Troy?! Lol. I wish). But really…………. I didn’t realise I was building a notorious reputation. Sigh.

Granted, I shoulda known that people would be talking about it because they were all popular boys in school… and when they didn’t turn up (and one turned up v v late), naturally people started to question. And the stories flowed.

Am I really a player?

I only dated 4 hottest guys of my batch… and dumped all except one.  So what?
They just didn’t happen to be the Right One. It’s not like I went out with them with the intention “to have fun” and use them for pleasure/played with their heart. Sometimes you gotta be cruel to be kind. They deserve someone else, who obviously isn’t me. They really should thank me, right? J

Truthfully this whole thing disturbed me in a way because I’ve always seen myself as a nice, innocent, gentle and sensitive soul. Hmm… maybe it’s not so true after all…(uh-oh)

On the other hand I also feel flattered. I must be hotter than I thought! haha. My confidence is at an all time high J


xoxo

Flashbak to VDay 10: Engaged and Single Again

Valentines Day 2010 : At this point V, L and I were engaged. 

We were happily planning our wedding rings, wedding dresses, hair, shoes, cards, guest lists, honeymoon etc. Serena was the only one fiancée-less. If she felt left out about it, it didn’t show. She’s a great sport like that.

Anyways somehow the path to the aisle started to be filled with thorns for V and I.

V found out that her Prince Charming who claimed to be a divorcee is actually still married with 5 kids! When he went for a business trip abroad, it was actually for his 3^rd or 4^th honeymoon with a very happy Mrs! Wtf. V broke it up immediately …. That was in April. Smart move V. Score:  V  1, Loser ExFiancee -100.

As for me, I realised that in my glee to be happily married forever after, I was closing my eyes on my fiancee’s big fault – a deal-breaker actually – his physical violence. After he left me with bruises and a swollen arm, I finally gave up on my stupid foolish dreams and declared to the world that I would rather be single for life than marry a monster. Yeay! (cue Rihanna's song “how ‘bout a round of applause….standing ovation”). I pulled the plug off our relationship in May.

As mentioned, L was the only one whose fiancée turned out to be the Real Deal. They went down the aisle in July.

And voila here we are…. 4 months after my break-up. Time to start keeping a record of our journey to find Mr Darcy (our all time fave Mr Right character).

Drumroll please, it’s time to rock and roll!

xoxo

Drumroll please , the Gossip Girl is back….

Hi there.

I don’t know whether anyone will ever read this blog but I feel like this is a v impt part of my life and I want to chronicle it. I wish I can tell y’all my real name but alas I can’t in the best interest of some characters who may not appreciate it ! J

So I will just adopt the names of the characters in one of my fave tv show :GG and use them for my bffs and  I (i.e the main cast in this Blog):

Blair : That’s me. Lol. She’s not exactly the nicest character in GG but she is so gorgeous! Anyways I’d like to think I’m gorgeous with a slightly bitchy side. Meow.

Serena :  My bff no.1 . She is a hot & petite gal but somehow plagued by Buddy’s Syndrome and extreme Gay-dar or PLU!! Go figure. We are still trying to understand this phenomenon. Maybe you can give us some ideas why as we go along.

Vanessa: My bff no.2. She’s the one who makes heads turn. Tall and voluptuous – but somehow painfully shy and thinks she’s overweight. Slightly better luck than Serena and I because she found her Mr Right a couple of years ago…  but they have been divorced since she caught him cheating on her. Oookay.. maybe she doesn’t have better luck ..I take that back. I guess we are are in the same boat ;)

Louise(Ok I know this is not a name from GG but she loves this name so I’ll grant her wish lol): Bff no 3. By far she is the luckiest of us all. She had a horrid start too, being in an abusive relationship for close to 6 years! After she finally mustered guts to ditch the Bastard, lo & behold immediately God gave her a gift for her courageous act: Mr Right. She is now happily married to him (got hitched about 2 months back) and we can’t be happier for her. U deserve all the happiness L!

All of us celebrated our 30^th last year and on our way to our 1^st yr in the 30s. Looking at the numbers I feel old but then looking at the love dramas in my life, it still reads like a teenage novel. Yikes! Is it time to grow up?
Or have I been dating boys instead of men? :P

xoxo